Chaffle Saturday: Why I’ll Never Be A Food Blogger

Chaffle Saturday: Why I’ll Never Be A Food Blogger
I keep this up to remind everybody.

Chaffle Saturday is now forever in my past. My dreams of becoming a food blogger have been dashed. It’s never going to happen. I’ll never be a famous chef, host my own show on the Food Network or be a professional food blogger. It’s not that I’m not a good cook because I am. I have a sign that says I’m the best. (Three sweet little faces brought it home to me for Mother’s Day one year.)

Even though I was been “professionally” trained (not really) as a child, mostly by attending the traveling Southern Living Cooking Schools with my grandmother, I have found out that I do not have what it takes to be a professional food blogger. I made the huge mistake of thinking I could do it. I thought I had a simple recipe and concept and could just throw it together. This is one of those times that just because you THINK you know what you’re doing, certainly does not mean you do. Stay with me here and you’ll see why.

You might be wondering why would you even try that? Recipes and cooking are not the focus of this blog so why? There are two reasons that led to my deluded state. As a brand new blogger, I’m learning how all this works. At times it’s very complicated. You have to be connected to Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and other social media platforms. But all the big time bloggers say use Pinterest. When you use Pinterest, somebody, maybe Pinterest, maybe something else I signed up for will send you a very informative email about what’s trending. Well the last few weeks the Chaffle is trending.

Now I’m going to let you down easy here. The Chaffle is NOT a Chocolate Waffle! Don’t make the same mistake I did, you will be sorely disappointed. It’s basically a cheese and egg waffle. I’m not sure why that’s not actually called a Chomelette but okay whatever. We will try to get that trending next.

They are just too cute.

The second reason is that the Quarterback and the Little Red Haired girl have started the countdown. They celebrated their minus one year anniversary and this time next year they’ll be Mr and Mrs. (I’m not crying, you are! Somebody get me a tissue).

So anyway, I need to get rid of some vacation pounds and some stress blubber. I thought what better way to get back on track than a good Saturday morning low carb breakfast starting none other than the everso trending, almighty Chaffle. And if I’m going to venture into the Chaffle trend, should I make a blog post about it? I mean if you cook and eat something and don’t make a social media post about it, did it even happen?

Now I am NOT making fun of food bloggers. I depend on them and consult them daily. There are some super cooks out there who can help you with whatever you need. They are putting in some time and energy to those recipe posts and pictures so you should totally give them your attention and praise if you use their recipes. I very mistakenly thought I could at least get one recipe done and posted. Technically, I have done just that but not how you might expect. No no no. Not at all.

First of all, when you are a food blogger, everything and I mean everything has to be spic and span clean. I mean EVERYTHING! You might ask why is it not already that way? Well I ask myself the same question daily. My husband probably mutters that under his breath daily. I never seem to have the answer except that I would rather hop skip and jump to the mountains or walk by the lake rather than clean the nooks and crannies of the nooks and crannies. But take my advice, if cleaning the heck out of your whole house obsessively for one blog post is not your thing, then don’t try to food blog. When I started taking pictures, I was flinging kool aid jammers (sorry Fivasaurus, I’ll find them before you get back), Yeti cups, Nalgene bottles, backpacks and my daily planner all into a pile out of sight of the camera.

Then I scrubbed my prep area-used a lot of elbow grease there. Apparently the Smartest Boy in the World had made himself some macaroni and left the aftermath. Also, he takes after his mother, apparently and is not a “clean as you go” kind of guy. No biggie, I’m just glad he fed himself.

So the second step after getting an area clean enough for picture was to gather all the food. That part I can do! If there are food bloggers that need help with prep, I’m your person! I had fresh farm eggs, herbs from my own garden, and cheese straight from Wisconsin. Prepping and planning I can do!

Chaffles? Easy Peasy Ingredients!

The actually combining of the food and cooking it, I can handle but the photography part is another issue altogether. In my head, I am imagining the pristine kitchens of every food blogger-beautifully decorated with white floors, white counters, white appliances…..It always seems they have white kitchens. But really now who can live in a white kitchen? What kind of perfect person is that?? My sister tried that and her little rascal decided to add some color and decorated it with a Sharpie. Now she has a white and blue kitchen. I probably high fived him for his creativity! But I definitely need to follow that white kitchen having, perfect person around for a day or so and learn a few things. So back to my small and dark kitchen, I go. It’s okay, I like it there.

So I got the prepping and mixing done. Now time for the cooking. I was gifted a Cucina Pro Bubble Waffle Maker for Mother’s Day, mostly because I said I want a Bubble Waffle Maker for Mother’s Day. I plugged it in and scooped out my Chaffle mixture onto the hot plates. These ingredients made enough mixture for two Chaffles. Thank goodness because guess what happened to the first one? Yep, cooked it too long….. Not long enough for the familiar sound of my fire alarm also known as the dinner bell. I mean how else are you going to know dinner is ready? Second batch of gooey eggs and Wisconsin cheese was lopped onto the waffle iron or Chaffle iron in this case. I set the timer this time and voila! I had produced a beautiful golden Chaffle. And oh how I wish I could show you, but I didn’t get a picture. So many rookie mistakes, so so many…

I’m renaming this the Chomlette.

As I am plating the best Chaffle onto a real plate-no paper plates for Chaffles-I realized the poor Sheriff is quietly pacing and cleaning. He is cleaning off the front porch bistro table, cleaning the main family table and even cleaning our back porch picnic table. Just cleaning any and all tables in hopes of actually getting breakfast sometime on a Saturday. He didn’t even know what a Chaffle was, just that it was taking way too long. He just wanted food. So I hurriedly finished, took some quick pictures and presented it to him. He took one look at it, took down the toaster and proceeded to ADD to his breakfast. The Chaffle was not going to be enough mainly because I took so long making it. He added some toast and homemade jelly which totally blew our low carbness out of the water.

The Starving Sheriff!

In the end, we were able to enjoy what is basically an omelette cooked on a waffle iron along with toast smothered in some good southern grandma made blackberry jalapeno preserves. We even dined al fresco because he cleaned those tables, you know. And by the looks of his plate, he enjoyed the Chaffle quite a bit, but he has advised me not to quit my day job just yet.

The Takeaway from Chaffle Saturday.

1.It was actually good! It was very tasty. The Bubble Waffle maker is a great Chaffle Maker. All the gooey bits of goodness gets trapped in those puffy bubbles.

2. You can basically add anything you want to eggs and cheese to make a Chaffle. Add basil and you’ll have a Baffle. Add heavy cream and you’ll have a Craffle. Add black coffee and you’ll have a Coffaffle Okay I’ll stop now. It’s past ridiculous.

3. You might add an extra egg or two, depending on size of the egg, if you use the Bubble Chaffle Maker.

4. Feed your husband a snack before you start making a blog post about cooking.

Have you tried the Chaffle? Let me in on your secrets! If you are interested in the Chaffle recipe I used, it’s posted below but I’m sure you can figure it out the Chaffle without my help.

Enjoy!

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3 thoughts on “Chaffle Saturday: Why I’ll Never Be A Food Blogger

  1. As a food blogger, this made me laugh so hard! I always joke that my hubs has gotten used to late dinners and luke-warm food since I started blogging. But he is a patient man thank goodness!

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